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QVIGear Newsletter > Sometimes You Want To Go Out To Shop
Sometimes You Want To Go Out To Shop

Sometimes you want to go shopping at a mass merchandiser

You fill the car with gas and discover you didn’t bring
enough money because the $3 per gallon gas went up to $3.50
while you were driving to the station. Oh well, you can cut
down on the lunch at the store fast food restaurant because
you’re never sure what is in that hamburger anyway.

The parking lot is full. You drive round and round until
you finally get a parking space 150 yards from the store.
You run through the rain that came up while you were
searching for a parking spot.

You are greeted at the door by a nice, older man who offers
you a cart he just polished to perfection and now seems to
be dangerously out of breath and clinging to the handles.
You need the cart but you refuse because you are afraid if
he gives it to you he will fall over. You sneak a cart from
a lady reading every label of the special sale goods that
are placed at the entrance. It always bottlenecks the
traffic. You decide the store locates it there to give the
man time to clean and hand out carts without going into
cardiac arrest.

You now enter the noisy, crowded store that is not unlike
the bumper car ride at the carnival. People pushing carts
fight for position in the not quite wide enough aisles. The
trick is to be able to stop long enough to select stuff
without being pushed on or run over by others. There is a
never ending line of customers who all seem to want to be
in your aisle at the same time you need to stop to shop.
You get goosed in your posterior and bruised on the back of
your ankles by the cart pushers determined to keep you
moving. You smile at the kid riding in the cart in front of
you even though you wish his mother would wipe his nose.
The kid returns your smile with a frown and throws a bottle
of aspirin at you out of his mom’s cart. You decide to keep
it because this is definitely an Excedrin experience.

You need entertainment so you work your way to the
electronics department to buy a new DVD. As a patriot you
remain on orange, amber or red alert, whatever they mean,
and watch for terrorists who may leave bags or something
unattended. Actually, you see several so you add 2 hours to
your shopping day, waiting for the owners of the unattended
carts, packages - and kids. The children seem to grow in
number. It is not unlike someone had broken and spilled
their ant farm ($5.95 aisle 3 ). The worker ant-like kids,
now free of parent, take over the electronics section,
dashing from game to game. They stop at each TV and stereo
to turn up the volume full blast. You try to get help from
the store employees who are either going on break or
returning from a break and whisk away without looking at
you. They can’t seem to hear you. You decide they must have
worked in the electronics section too long.

The employees mysteriously disappear in the crowd. You
never see them in any department. There must be a secret
gathering place where they discuss their career choices and
benefits that are so much better than their graduate
degrees promised. And, they get a store shirt or smock to
wear. Could it be any better?

In the meantime the kids continue to run from one game to
the next and turn up all the radios and TV’s to full blast
producing indescribable ear shattering sounds worthy of
heavy metal rock band top 10 awards and accolades. You
decide not to get the DVD that you came for in the first
place because maneuvering through the kids is too risky,

You move on as soon as the parents return to claim their
packages and reluctantly collect their kids. They scream at
them for not watching the packages.. The parents,
apparently thought their children would be watched over by
the children’s supervisor who, they must think, works in
the electronics section. So, they’re not terrorists, just
inconsiderate parents. Although, as you rub your sore ears,
you think they might be a new breed of terrorist because
you are now super stressed and bordering on insanity due to
the noise that will, at the least, leave you slightly deaf
in your left ear.

Finally, when you have all your selections in your basket
you make the shopper’s dash to the check out line, racing
to be first in the line that looks least busy but always
turns out to be the slowest.

You discover you are behind the shopper with the kid in the
cart who threw the aspirin at you and now he is crying and
screaming for the candy that the store displays there just
for that purpose. You open the aspirin and take several. In
your mind, what is left of it, you thank the child for the
aspirin but what actually emerges is a curse word you
hardly ever use. In fact, you remember, the last time you
uttered this vile word was when you shopped at this mass
merchandiser..

Finally, you get checked out and only have to push the cart
or carry your stuff that long 150 yards to your car. You
discover your just washed, tenderly cared for car, has a
new scratch on the driver side door.

Ah yes, sometimes you want to get out and shop at a mass
merchandiser .. But for those times when you want to shop
in the safety and convenience of your own home shop
QVIGear.com.

You get unique QVIGear products and are provided an
entrance to your own special mall filled with the best,
most reliable stores on the internet including Amazon,
Office Depot, Sharper Image, Tevo, Target (yes, even mass
merchandising shopping from the comfort of your home) and
many more.

If you sign up for the newsletter you will get notices of
specials from these stores. In addition, QVIGear will
provide extra special offers like added value free
products, discounts and gift cards. It's fun, fast and
easy and makes QVIGear your make sense first stop shop on
the web.

 

 

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